Learn Spanish The BigBarcelonaBlog Way : Ser and Estar

“To be or not to be!”

Thus did William Shakespeare, the greatest writer the world has ever produced, sum up the weightiest dilemma facing mankind. It is succinct. It is powerful. It is unforgettable. In English, that is. In Spanish it sounds more like this:

“Ser o no ser o estar o no estar o una mezcla de ser y estar y una mezcla de no ser y no estar. Más o Menos.”

Doesn’t grab you quite as effectively, I think we can all agree. I mean an English Hamlet’s indecisive enough (yes I know he’s technically Danish, clever clogs) but a Spanish Hamlet is all over the place.

So what is going on here? Is it another futile attempt by the Spanish to pretend that Cervantes (one book about a man fighting windmills) is as great an artist as Shakespeare (39 plays about everything that ever has or will really matter) by deliberately sabotaging the Swan of Avon’s finest hour? Well, I like a conspiracy theory as much as the next man (unless the next man is lurking behind a grassy knoll with a firearm) but even I have to conclude that’s not the case here.

No, it is something far crazier. The Spanish have two words for “To Be”

Let us conjugate them in all their glory (present tense only):

Ser                                Estar

(Yo)            Soy                               Estoy

(Tu)            Eres                              Estás

(El)             Es                                 Está

(Nosotros) Somos                          Estamos

(Vosotros) Sois                              Estáis

(Ellos)        Son                               Están

So far, so not that bad. But now we come to when you use them. And things get properly out of control.

How do you know which verb you should use if you wanted to say something as simple as:

I am happy. (Admittedly not a sentiment Hamlet was often reaching for.)

It depends.

Spanish teachers (and the BigBarcelonaBlog has had more than most) will insist to you that there is some kind of sense behind which one of the verbs you choose. I should caution you immediately that this is nonsense. Any Spanish teacher who tells you there is any rhyme or reason behind the selection of “ser” or “estar” should be treated as a charlatan and if possible immediately dispatched to a nunnery.

What they will say is this – it all depends on whether the verb “to be” is being used in a permanent sense (in which case you should use “ser”) or a temporary sense (in which case you should use “estar”).

So with the aforementioned concept : I am happy.

You should say : Soy Feliz, if…

 By and large you are a happy, optimistic person who sees every glass as half full even when there isn’t any water in it.

You should say : Estoy Contento if…

You are just in a good mood, say, for example, if a couple of university friends have arrived to visit you from Wittenburg. This is likely to be a temporary sensation especially when it turns out that they’re actually spying on you on behalf of your evil uncle who killed your dad and married your mum and is still coming on like he wants to be your mate . Sorry for the spoiler if you’ve never read Hamlet.

Now, come on, BigBarcelonaBlog, I hear you cry. That doesn’t sound so bad. I can distinguish between permanent and temporary states. We can do this.

You fools! You’ve let those devious Spanish teachers pour their linguistic poison into your ear. You see once they’ve got you nodding at the easy bit they then try and slip all the contradictions past you. Like:

Death.

Now, unless you’re Jesus, death is a fairly permanent state. I mean I’d go so far as to say it is pretty much the most permanent state. So if, for example, I was to pick up a skull and glumly observe :

Yorick is dead.

Admittedly it lacks the ring of the original but more importantly which verb should you use?

You say Ser? Think again. It’s Estar. Why? Now you’ll see your Spanish teacher start shrugging and saying it’s time for la pausa (the break). There’s no explanation.

How about the time?

What could be more temporary than time. It is one o’clock. Previously it was twelve o’clock. Soon it will be two o’clock. So estar, right?

Wrong. It’s ser. Es la una to be precise.

I promise you I once had an evil Spanish teacher who argued that it should be “ser” because it was permanently one o’clock for the actual moment it was one o’clock. Pick the logic out of that one.

And now places. What could be more permanent than a place? Elsinore is in Denmark. It has always been in Denmark and it always will be in Denmark.

So if you were to say “Elsinore is in Denmark” which verb?

Wrong. It’s estar. Because arbitrarily all locations use estar and this trumps all concepts of permanence and transience. Why? Nobody knows.

On a side note, I should point out that I’m most relieved I picked Hamlet to illustrate this post.  If I’d gone for Macbeth, Burnham Wood would be giving me no end of trouble right about now.

Anyway as I was saying all locations use estar. Except of course when they don’t. Try this one for size.

You enter your new Spanish language school. You approach the receptionist and confidently ask for the whereabouts of Doctor Cervantes A1 class.

“¿Donde está la clase de Doctor Cervantes?” you say.

The receptionist’s face registers disapproval. What can possibly have gone wrong?

  

You should have used the verb “ser”.

Why? Because Doctor Cervantes class is a group of people gathered together to learn and not an actual location. It is in a location but it isn’t one, if you see what I mean. I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t.

And then when your Spanish teacher has completed her explanation and is acting as though everything should be clear she will top it all off by giving you a cruel smile and saying,

“¿Está bien?”

   Now you’re on your own.           

Learn Spanish the BigBarcelonaBlog Way : Simple Verbs and Complex Yous

So you've read the BigBarcelonaBlog's guide to speaking fluent Spanish in Fifty Words or less, said Hola and Que Tal, and now you want more. You yearn to converse in Spanish at a greater conceptual depth, to offer pithy insights and debate vigorously and insightfully on the varied topics of the day with your Castillian amigos. And you come to the BigBarcelonaBlog and you say “Ayudame BigBareclonaBlog”. I will overlook the fact you didn't call me Godfather BigBarcelonaBlog because unlike Marlon Brando I'm not hung up on status and get on with it.

       

First the blunt truth. If you are going to be stretching your verbal contributions you are going to need verbs. And verbs is where Spanish starts to get just a little bit tricky.

       

Let me demonstrate by comparing the Spanish verb with the English verb.

       

The English verb is a simple, uncomplicated thing. It wants to make life easy for you. It is your friend. Allow me to conjugate one.

        Verb : To eat

       

        I eat

        You eat

       

        ….And now the complicated bit...

        He eats

        She eats

        ...Gah that was a bit crazy says the English language. Adding one whole extra letter! We really let ourselves go there didn't we? Let's get back to normality...

        We eat

        They eat

You see simple, to the point. The kind of verb that gets you chomping on your fish ‘n’chips with the least possible inconvenience

        For comparison purposes. The Spanish verb to eat

        Verb : Comer

        I eat : (Yo) Como

        You (informal) eat : (Tu) Comes

        He/She/You (formal) eats : (El/Ella/Usted) Come

        We eat : (Nosotros) Comemos

        You (informal) eat : (Vosotros) Coméis

        He/She/You (formal) eats : (Ellos/Ellas/Ustedes) Comen

Do you see how complicated that is? There's so many endings that you won't be chewing on a mouthful of succulent  paella any time soon. At least not if you want to bite into it grammatically correctly. Indeed it has been argued that the obesity crisis currently sweeping through the English speaking nations is not in fact due to our greedy consumption of fatty fast foods but instead because the simplicity of our verb conjugation allow us tuck in much quicker. While the Spanish are still checking their endings we've already got a bellyful and are reaching for seconds. And the simple availability and fast formation of our verb endings is reflected in our waistlines. It should be acknowledged that this argument is so far confined to a niche group and that niche group is the BigBarcelonaBlog. But people used to laugh at the idea of Plate Tectonics. And they're not laughing now. Oh no. Actually I don't know if anyone did laugh at Plate Tectonics as they lacked a satisfactory punchline but they certainly pooh-poohed. And they're not pooh-poohing now.

Back to Spanish verb endings which are so varied that the subject pronouns  have become redundant (that's why they are in brackets in the example above because nobody actually says them) as the form of the verb tells you who is doing the action. So to say “I eat” you simply say “Como” and similarly “he eats” translates to “Come” and should you wish to say “you eat” then...

You stop. You consider the number of people you are talking to. You consider the country you are in. You consider the region of the country you are in. You consider the age and status of the person you are talking to in relation to yourself and then, and only then, do you dare to utter a word. It's a complicated business which takes time to sort out. No wonder the Spanish eat so late.

Glance back up to the verbs above. You will notice that English allows for only possible configuration. “You eat.” This is the same whether the you is your friend or your boss or two of your friends or two of your bosses. To each of them you would say “You eat...” Simple, straightforward, spiffing.

But in Spanish all these people would need to be addressed differently depending on the number of them and the level of formality. And when I say informal or formal I don't mean whether they keep their mouth closed while chewing. Instead I mean primarily whether you are in Northern Spain or Southern Spain/ South America and whether the person is younger or older or more senior or less senior than you.

Take a deep breath. Here goes:

If you are talking to your friend anywhere you use the tu form (but without saying tu remember).

So you say : Comes.

Simple!

But if you are talking to your boss it depends. If you are in Barcelona you would use the tu form but if you were in Andalucia or Buenos Aires you would use the “usted” form. So it would be either “Comes” or “Come”. Not so simple.

If you were talking to two of your friends you would say : Coméis

But the problem arises again if you are talking to two of your bosses. It depends where you are what form you use. So in Barcelona your friends and your bosses would both be “Coméis” but in Sevilla or La Paz it would be “Comen” for the bosses. Indeed the confusion around how exactly you should address your boss has been postulated as an explanation for the much higher incidence of self-employment in Spain compared to other countries. At least when talking to yourself you are allowed to say pretty much what you like.

Strangers can be another problem. Children are always “tu” and old age pensioners are always “usted” but in between it's complete chaos and no Spanish person has ever adequately explained to the BigBarcelonaBlog how and when you know the difference, instead just shrugging and saying irritating stuff like “you just know” which is absolutely no use at all to those of us who just don't.

The BigBarcelonaBlog therefore recommends that if unsure you fall back on the confused linguist staple expedient known far and wide as...the mumble.

I know it's a cop-out and as a plain-speaking, no-nonsense, tell-it-like-it-is sort of blog I should be ashamed but what can I tell you? (The easy thing about English is that when I write what can I tell you? I can do it without fear of offending anyone whereas if I was doing it in Spanish I wouldn't know if the person reading my blog was younger or older, junior or senior, in an internet cafe on the Ramblas or in a hacienda in Montevideo and I would be almost guaranteed to upset someone.)

The other solution is just to ignore the rest of the Spanish speaking world and just come to Barcelona where everybody is a friend and nobody needs to be called anything but tu. Think how much easier your linguistic journey would be and, more importantly, how much more relevant the rest of my blog would be and how much you'd want to go and read the rest of it clicking on an advert or two on your way. It would be rude of me not to leave you (or you, or you, or you) to it. Adios